March 24, 2008

Why does communication break down after marriage? Often, the answer lies in emotions. Before marriage we had one over-powering emotion – love. But now, the emotions of hurt, anger, disappointment, and fear often dominate. These emotions do not encourage us to communicate. Or, if we communicate it is likely to be critical.

We speak out of our anger and create even more negative feelings. The key is in learning how to share emotions without condemnation. “I’m feeling hurt and when you have time, I need your help.” Identifying your feelings and choosing to share them is step one. Step two is accepting the feelings of your mate and asking: “What can I do to help?”

Today's A Growing Marriage Daily content has been written by Dr. Gary Chapman and is based on the book Dr. Gary Chapman On the Marriage You've Always Wanted by Dr. Gary Chapman. Published by Moody Publishers, copyright 2005. Used by permission.